I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
