Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
