Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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