Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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