Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
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i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
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You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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