so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
