Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
