everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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