Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
