Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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