he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
