I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize