I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize