Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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