....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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