Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I have post one night stand depression
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
