I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
