i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
