Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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