i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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