what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
