we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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