To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
