They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
