My balls are so social today.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
