I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
