I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
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Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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