I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
