it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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