i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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