Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
