wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
My vagina is very pro this idea
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
