we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
