she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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