What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
