Well douche your snatch and let's go!
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I need to wash the frat house off of me
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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