and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
