I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Randomize
