somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Randomize