no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize