I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
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