there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
