Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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