I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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