And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
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He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
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I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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