its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize