At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
All the doctor said was why
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
