i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Randomize
