remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize