So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
there's paper in my vomit.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize