I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
