Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.

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(818): people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight. http://tfl.nu/8h1f

Replies (7) Good night (3105) Bad night (629)
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(410): View more from Maryland

She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.

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(410): She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard. http://tfl.nu/ezls

Replies (9) Good night (613) Bad night (2876)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..

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(304): she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously.. http://tfl.nu/exbf

Replies (24) Good night (1503) Bad night (6688)
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(647): View more from Ontario

Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party

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(647): Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party http://tfl.nu/47pk

Replies (33) Good night (12622) Bad night (994)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.

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(336): Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things. http://tfl.nu/s0f9

Replies (23) Good night (4077) Bad night (1110)
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(206): View more from Washington

Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.

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(206): Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU. http://tfl.nu/drhd

Replies (6) Good night (1217) Bad night (2949)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.

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(617): she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something. http://tfl.nu/1xv3

Replies (17) Good night (1017) Bad night (3604)
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(313): View more from Michigan

its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore

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(313): its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore http://tfl.nu/d5rl

Replies (5) Good night (675) Bad night (1738)
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(480): View more from Arizona

You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show

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(480): You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show http://tfl.nu/lsuc

Replies (5) Good night (2667) Bad night (701)
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(678): View more from Georgia

You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.

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(678): You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary. http://tfl.nu/2yw2

Replies (15) Good night (1694) Bad night (571)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.

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(609): i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen. http://tfl.nu/t0rk

Replies (2) Good night (1032) Bad night (1188)
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(775): View more from Nevada

By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face

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(775): By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face http://tfl.nu/uzn2

Replies (4) Good night (755) Bad night (344)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.

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(203): She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift. http://tfl.nu/rhgi

Replies (4) Good night (382) Bad night (697)
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(423): View more from Tennessee

That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.

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(423): That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator. http://tfl.nu/o4y1

Replies (3) Good night (230) Bad night (337)
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(813): View more from Florida

You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex

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(813): You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex http://tfl.nu/m04q

Replies (2) Good night (334) Bad night (219)

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