I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i think my mom watched the whole time
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
